Monthly Archives: February 2009

Word of the Day: Fiber

Lewis was sick (see previous post).  It seemed like he needed a little treat, so I asked him if he wanted anything special from the grocery store.

“Get Pop Tarts,” he said. “Brown sugar frosted Pop Tarts,” he specified.

Did I expect him to request broccoli, fish oil and flax seed? No.

So when I saw Brown sugar Pop Tarts made with whole grain, I figured that this was a compromise – frosting for Lewis and a bit of fiber to assuage my mommy guilt about buying junk food. I saw it as a win-win situation. pop-tarts

Lewis was thrilled with the Pop Tarts – until he saw the box. “Whole grain?” he noted with suspicion. “Fiber? Ugh. I don’t want these, I want regular Pop Tarts.”

The worst part was, my husband agreed.

“If you are going  to buy junk food,” he said, “buy the real stuff. Not something that is all hopped  up with whole wheat and fiber.Trying to pass off Pop Tarts as healthy is like making bacon out of tofu,” he proclaimed.” Later that afternoon, Harris went to the store and came back with Strawberry Pop Tarts with absolutely no whole grains. Lewis loved them.

Me? Turns out the Brown Sugar frosted Pop Tarts are only 200 calories  apiece  that’s the same as a plate of steamed broccoli and guess what –  the Pop Tarts have more fiber!  Here’s to my new favorite breakfast.



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Word of the Day: February Vacation

I’ve often wondered why schools have February vacation. I mean wasn’t Christmas break  just a minute ago? I could understand if families needed help  tapping their sugar maple trees or  birthing spring lambs or cutting blocks of ice out of the local ponds maple-sugaring-1940 – but here in suburban Massachusetts, February vacation seems like an evil plot by the Board of Education to test the limits of a mother’s sanity. I mean ten days without school in the middle of February? C’mon.

Fortunately, Lewis was invited to go skiing with his friend’s family this week. “I’m sick,” he says of his prowess on the slopes (see December 5th, 2008 post). Unfortunately,  he  is sick – not slalom champion sick – but sore throat, fever, runny nose sick.  So instead of spending February vacation skiing, he is lying on the couch in the tv room ordering cinammon toast, Oodles of Noodles and Easy Mac. I have to admit, I like a kid who is just a little bit sick. The low-grade fever slows him down just a little and makes him a little bit warmer and more receptive to sitting close to me on the couch and cuddling.

Of course all the closeness has a price and now my throat is suspiciously sore. All that Easy Mac has a price, too. Lewis didn’t have much of an appetite yesterday, so the dog finished the macaroni and cheese that was left on the coffee table and was up all night with diarreah.

Amid all the soggy Kleenex, the half-eaten bowls of neon-orange macaroni and the dog poop, it occured to me that perhaps February vacation was derived to quarantine sick kids and keep them and their germs at home so that they can return to school and stay there… until their mother’s regain their sanity.


Filed under Humor, Families, kids, Moms, Parenting Humor, Uncategorized

Word of the Day: Octuplets

The octuplets made their television debut this morning and their mom, Nadya Suleman, was ready for her close-up – plump lips, chisled nose and fresh French manicure.

french-maniAnyone who has ever diapered a newborn knows that long nails and poopie diapers go together like….fourteen kids and a media circus. And, while the public wonders how an unemployed, single mom will be able to support fourteen children (who will inevitably have some special needs) Nadya Suleman has faith in the volunteers from her church and in America’s insatiable appetite for reality television — no matter how unreal it seems.


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