Today is the first day of summer vacation. Hurray! I envision a two whole months of playing outside, swimming, bike riding, eating peanut butter sandwiches on a blanket in the backyard and lucrative lemonade stands. Of course, that’s for me.
My kid is in the basement playing XBox 360.
This is what happens when you don't play outside
Okay, it’s raining. So, I’ll let him grow mushrooms between his toes and burn out his retinas for one day. I’ll start nagging him to go outside tomorrow.
Today I went to the supermarket. It was raining and the parking lot was packed, except for the three handicapped spaces and two other spaces right next to the front door. However, those two other spaces were reserved with a big red sign for customers with infants.
I deserve to park here
Wait a second, I thought. I used to shop at this store all the time when I had infants. I was lousy with infants and there was never reserved parking or shopping carts with built-in baby seats or candy-free check-out lines.
I felt like I had a right to park there. I felt like I had already paid for the privilege of using that space fifteen years ago when I would schlep across that parking lot with a screaming baby in the 50-pound Rock ‘n Ride infant seat and a toddler in a backpack. Yeah, I deserve to park in that space.
But I didn’t.
So, GM is bankrupt, the polar caps are melting and there’s nothing good on network television. But, here’s what is better now-a-days…
When you order General Gau’s chicken at a Chinese restaurant, you can get it with brown rice and neutralize your guilt.
Skype. Amazing. My daughter is in South Africa and I can talk to her for free and we can see each other. It is just like the Jetsons.
Leg shaving technology has vastly improved since I first dropped a razor blade into my Dad’s razor and sliced my shins open.
You don’t need a date for the prom. Girls can go with a group of friends – guys with their buddies. Somehow everyone seems to have a better good time – without all the pressure of dates. Great if you have one, who cares if you don’t. Let’s dance.